My Ex-Boyfriend

I had a dream last night and woke up feeling horrible about myself. So, I'll blog the feeling away.

I've been at Law School now for a week-ish and I've only seen my Ex once. So I really didn't expect to dream about him. Why the hell would I? We've been exes for much longer than we dated and he has a new girlfriend now.

Last night, my dream self hatched a plan, purely to be a total...well, you know. Whats the google policy on bad language?

I was with my Ex and his new girlfriend in a lecture (and we're not doing the same course in real life) and I decided I'd manipulate him into cheating on her with me. So I began crying and made him believe I wanted him back. He came over that night and I continued the charade until he confessed that he wanted to get back together too. At which point he kissed me and then I told him I'd changed my mind and he should just go home to his girlfriend. Then my dream self kicked him out the door knowing that I'd either ended his relationship or he'd know for the rest of it that he'd cheated on her.

Then my best friend was in a car accident and then I woke up. Not sure if she lived. This is also alarming.

Now, I'm no Mother Theresa. I'm not selfless and I'm not always particularly kind. But I'm NOT cruel and so I woke up feeling simply horrible that I'd ever consider such a thing, even in my subconcious. So I'm going to play the Sims 3 now and get the sims of my ex and his girlfriend to get married. That is the most fitting way I can give them my blessing and hopefully rid my subconscious of whatever is going on in there about them.

This dream description, by the way, was a short paraphrase of what I can remember. I am able to remember alot more of my dreams than other people seem to be able too. It is a blessing if the dream is funny but when it is like this dream it can be very creepy to remember every sentence, movement and touch. Eugh.

I think I should try to find someone of my own at Law School. The last week I have started many, many conversations with "Hi, I'm Belle, What's your name?" And I've met some really great people who I think I'm going to be friends with, but no obvious romantic prospects. Ah well. Generally, I like being single.